First Day!
The first day of school was really exciting. We have friends at the school and many of our customer's children are there. The boys walked in like it was the most natural thing and started playing happily so we said quick good-byes and left.
As we are shut on Monday, we decided to do some shopping and then have brunch. While we were sitting outside the cafe, a mum went by with a newborn in a baby carrier. I felt the emotions well up and what followed was a good 20 minutes of blubbing into my french toast.
It really surprised me. My children have been going to child-care since they were three and a half. I didn't feel nervous or even remotely sad when they started their two days of kinda. I think what I felt then was the relief for the break, the time to get some stuff done on my own.
I can't really put my finger on what made me cry. Sadness. Loss. Anxiety. Fear. Perhaps a mix of all of these. I know there was pride and happiness too. Heck, I think I've done a bloody good job so far.
As we enjoy this new chapter I know the book hasn't quite closed on the old one, they will be my little babies for awhile longer. When they hurt themselves they still need my cuddles, I just hold on a little tighter.
5 comments:
oh boy such a big big milestone. i guess what would get me the most emotional is the thought of the playground. that big ashphet ocean conjours up so many mixed memories. i walked past the local primary recently and saw a little prep girl all on her own. she had a wacky pompom hat on and my heart went out to her. i wanted to stand there and talk to her all lunchtime. your little guys are so lucky they have each other. still its a giant step out of the nest. well done mum xxx
ps ace to have u back on the interweb xx
Yeah, I got all sad the other night watching a video from Lois' first week. She is so different even though she's only 4 months old now. I felt silly being upset over it, but things do change so fast.
Oh my lovely, I feel for you. What a big step! I reckon there will be so many first times that bring us to tears in their long lives. Am looking at houses back in town so may well be seeing you more often soon! Huge love to you and your three gorgeous guys. xxxxxxxxxx
I had those same tears, and it is really hard to pin point. I thought it might have been jsut the passing of time, I watched her on the night before school, asleep, and before I knew it I was a mess, crying! I would so love another baby, but alas, my clock is slowing, and we can't just romp rolly polly on the bed to get pregnant, if you know what I mean!
I found myself blubbing the other day because my lass now pushes me away when I try to cuddle her. She is just too darn busy to snuggle in my arms. Wasnt expecting that sort of thing til the teenage years :(
I'm sure you've done an aces job, their confidence just proves it.
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